Forgiveness of Others
The reality of the generational abuse in my family and sensing I took on inherited shame and guilt that never belonged to me impacted my life journey. The intensity behind my desire to make everything okay and better for everyone else is what I have come to realize was a mission I could never achieve. What I can achieve – perceptions of guilt and shame I can personally clear, and open to seeing things I have judged falsely. At the heart of it all – self-forgiveness and forgiveness of others.
After confronting the abuse of my nieces by my sister’s husband in her 2nd marriage, it was an immense process of accepting that she knew but chose not to act on her daughter’s behalf. What was even more disheartening – she remained with her husband.
In future years I did come to understand her choices. I realized the roots of all she did was out of fear. She stayed with her husband at great cost – losing close association with all her grandchildren, except her son’s. Her primal fear, being alone and without support.
Both my sister and brother-in-law have passed on – and in this hour I can say what I want for both is that their journey ongoing is into love and healing. My sister is forever in my heart for precious moments, joy, and laughter we shared before I knew of the abuse. That is all I ever want to carry forward in memory of her. I am enclosing a beautiful piece she wrote before she left that says what was in her heart. My sister’s name was Edie, but her favorite flower was a Daisy, and she signed this letter as “Daisy.”
“The Star”
As the darkness covers the sky, the twinkling lights of the stars begin to shine.
As I stand in awe, and look upward, those shimmering lights become brighter and brighter.
I feel I can reach out and touch those twinkling lights. Like reaching out to touch the lights of God. For each star in heaven must be other souls. For we are all lights of stars If only we would let our light shine,
As I look upward at those shimmering heavens, each in its own place, knowing that each star, each galaxy is telling its own story. My heart aches to be a shining star. Faintly shining yet becoming brighter, part of the heavenly host. And praising God, someday I too shall be very bright and shining for I was and forever shall be.
I am Daisy.
A Moment of Forgiving and Communication from My Sister
Wherever in eternity my sister is, amidst those stars, my singular prayer is that unconditional love is the sole reality. In my move to Montana, I have a new sacred space for my growth and evolution surrounded by a 360-degree view of mountains. Shortly after I moved here while in my wonderful cabin abode, I was deeply contemplating my sister. I wanted to feel her love and embrace of where I am now and that I could sense her acknowledgment of that.
I felt drawn to walk down to the stream around what I call my “Grace Land space” Daisies do not grow wild in this mountain area. As I neared the stream I beheld a single daisy – glorious and beautiful and a butterfly landed on it. I was in amazement at the wonder of this. I knew it was my sister conveying her joy in my new space and work.
Love finds a way; Love always wins, and forgiveness is essential to that reality. Daisies have taken on a more beautiful meaning than ever. I took a picture of that Daisy, and it is now in a beautiful frame in my living room. My sister’s Light is shining here.
As challenging as it may be – my releasing my unforgiveness of my sister’s choices – freed me. I honor what I did in the intervention I had to do. I also know that judgment I never let go of wounds me and creates bitterness. My two choices in life – better or bitter. See MYOB Principle #5.
Look today at where forgiveness of others can free you to move forward to being more kind and lighter.
About the image: A single daisy by a steam: A symbol of Forgiving for me! Learn about the symbolism of daisies.
Monthly Theme and Weekly Speakers.
Every month, we take the Key Principles of MYOB and put them into practice in our lives. Looking at the deeper call before us — What are we each to “Be” to bring about societal change through our soul evolution in ways that establish justice, love, and care for all – without exception. Please join us weekly on Thursdays at 7 p.m. EDT for our virtual program.